Thank you for the feedback from last week's email "Know and use your strengths, it is great to know people are working diligently on their strengths to further their careers and their personal goals. I thank you all for your kind words and just reply by saying - this is what I am here for. I especially like the comment, "work to your strengths and outsource your weaknesses". This is such a good way to recognize no one can be brilliant at everything.
So to follow on on this theme, this week I have 7 questions to assist in moving you out of your comfort zone.
So are you? In a comfortable place that is? I don't mean your seat, but with your current state of play at work, in your career, or maybe in your relationship? In most aspects of life, being in your comfort zone is a great place to be, however, some might say "A ship is safe in a harbor, but that's not what ships are planned for." What were you planning to be, once upon a time?
This week, I would like to get you to consider if you are too comfortable, and what to do if you would like to move forward to maximize your potential and get back on track. Today I have the first part of an exercise I use with my clients, to help the begin the process of getting out of their comfort zone. To see the full exercise see the file below
A well-known quote by Gina Milicia reads,
“A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there.”
As a coach working with many clients, I can attest that this is true. If you think logically - a new career, a promotion, dealing with unruly students, or even just becoming something more - only present themselves when you leave your comfort zone and stretch yourself.
So this week, rank your comfort level from 1 to 10, where 1 = I’m not at all comfortable, 5 = I feel perfectly balanced between taking risks and feeling comfortable, to 10 = I’m so comfortable I feel bored and unmotivated.
Then ask yourself these 7 questions
There are other parts to this exercise that can look even deeper into what you can do to help you out of your comfort zone, drop me an email if you believe it is time for a change.
This week my EDGE Coaching "tip of the week" is
"Step outside your comfort zone"
If you can do this once, each day this week, I promise you will likely learn something new about yourself, (or at the very least begin to remember why you do what you do).
Remember as much as you have a comfort zone, you also have a courage zone.
Thank you for the fantastic response to last week's Tip (rebuilding your career confidence), it was lovely to see people sharing their thoughts and supporting others they know. A common theme mentioned was knowing what to focus on to improve one's prospects. This is a great point, so this week I'll cover this area very briefly if at all possible.
This week I will leave you with an opportunity to improve you or your business through the week by answering 5 simple questions to create 10 personal or business strengths. This is because we should all know that the area for greatest improvement lies with our strengths (and not our weaknesses)
This week's quote is so true as stated by American businesswoman Sophia Amoruso, she said'
"True success lies in knowing your weaknesses and playing to your strengths"
So this week, I would like to offer you parts one and two of a four-part exercise I give clients who are focusing on improving their prospects or that of their business or school.
Part one is to consider your top 10 strengths, as you go about your day just be aware of this by asking yourself the following questions;-
I mentioned this was a four-part strategy, in part two I would be asking more detailed coaching questioning of you to support you in discovering your top 10 strengths and talents. If you are interested in seeing these questions, you can find the file on my website home page or click here Questions to identify strengths
Followed by using a coaching wheel tool to take a deep dive into your top 8 strengths, where you score how the individual strengths are currently used then look at how those scores can be improved.
The final stage would be creating an action plan to help you commit to moving forwards by utilizing your strengths and talents on a more regular basis so you can boost your prospects.
If this is of real interest to you, feel free to make contact, but for now, my EDGE Coaching "Tip of the week" is
"Know and use your strengths"
Be reminded of how special you are, and let me know how it goes.
.Lately, I have had a number of wonderful conversations about careers and the effect the pandemic has had on people's thinking. So today I thought I would share a brief thought and leave you with an exercise to rebuild your confidence in your career, if you or someone you know, may need it. I am fully aware that you are most likely happy in your current position, but I am also of the opinion that you may know someone who may need a little support.
My quote for this week comes from Oprah Winfrey and it is so true.
"create the highest, grandest vision for your life, because you become what you believe"
So here goes.
It is true that most people are happy at work they have a good grasp of the path they are takings and how to get there. They feel great about their contribution and jump out of bed on a Monday Morning rearing to go. I know this as this was me as a teacher before making the difficult decision to give it up and focus my attention on coaching people instead.
However, it would be irresponsible to believe everyone is of the same mind. Some are so unhappy at work that they dread Monday mornings, Even after the restful weekend they feel burnt out, anxious, or even a little depressed because of their job or job prospects?
Not wanting to focus too much on the negatives, there is also a group of people who are both happy and unhappy, If this is you, perhaps you feel you’re in a position to step up to the next level but are being held back by something or someone (maybe even yourself). Then even though you love your job, because of the pandemic, your confidence in yourself and in your professional skills might have suffered.
Many people experience these situations at some point in their careers, but not everyone experiences low career confidence. Over time, having work-related low confidence and self-esteem can lead to a variety of physical and mental health issues. You might doubt yourself and over-analyze your decisions – not just work-related ones. This lack of confidence can also slow your career progression and affect your financial stability.
There are a number of things that may create low career confidence? Here are a few that may resonate with you:
Regardless of the reasons, low career confidence can be effectively addressed. Here are six suggestions to begin re-building your career confidence.
"Self-confidence is a super power, once you start to believe in yourself, the magic starts happening"
As a coach, I am here to champion you. I see you as naturally creative, resourceful, and whole, so this week's "Tip of the week" is
"Rebuild your career confidence"
This week, be aware of what you bring and make notes of what you have achieved, and the skills, strengths, and talents you bring to the role. Just two things each day will show you your importance to the business. Drag out your resume and start to add new insights. Always be ready, just in case an opportunity does present itself.
At the end of this week you, or if you have shared with someone you know, will be more confident in your (their) self-worth.
If you would like more support in this area, reach out, or use the diary link below. As always I am here if you wish to invest in yourself.
For more support use this exercise to highlight your challenges career_coaching.pdf
Have a wonderful week
This week I would like to share some thoughts on "being your own best friend" as an extension of last week's "Tip" I will also leave you with an additional exercise to try through the week.
It was so lovely to receive the responses to last week's Tip, it seemed to resonate with a good few of you. I love hearing from you and getting your feedback.
Talking of feedback, I had a comment about the best way to remember the importance of being kind to yourself, especially in these difficult times for everybody. I had put in the following point last week
Be your own best friend; treat yourself like your most treasured friend whom you respect and trust. Remember never to talk down to yourself, always talk yourself up. Again speak to yourself as you would your very best friend.
To that lovely person, I share this quote and I would recommend everyone to copy and paste it on your fridge so you see it every day;
"You will never speak to anyone as much as you speak to yourself in your head, be kind to yourself"
Remember that your world will not get any better by focusing solely on your faults, so why do it.
Being kind to yourself definitely has an impact on your mood and that of those around you.
So this week I would like you to try this exercise for 24 hours and see where it takes you.
For one day (24Hrs), decide not to moan, whinge or say anything negative to yourself. If you catch yourself doing any of these, then start again from the beginning. Once you get accustomed to this, then start to find a positive in the situation.
This may not seem difficult, but believe me, if you are not used to it, it can be quite a challenge. When you can achieve one day, it'll be easier to do two and three until it becomes a habit, it will certainly make you a better friend to yourself
Tip of the week "Be your own best friend"
This week I wanted to write about, and give you a few ways to develop your Self-Reliance, after all :
"Self -Reliance is the only true road to freedom and being one's own person is its own reward"- Patricia Sampson
What is strange is that as a coach, I spend most of my time with clients helping them to be just this, so they don't need me. Am I doing myself out of a job? No not at all, my job is to help you develop your self-reliance and people need support with this skill.
Here is my initial master plan
Take a pen and paper and answer these questions;
I know this can be a daunting prospect, so, if you need help to get started/going, please feel free to reach out. It won't cost you a thing, and I'd be happy to help.
We all know that the word NO has very negative connotations, so this week I would like to share 10 alternatives to just saying NO.
Last week, one of my clients was asking about how to make a more positive impact on students who were struggling in class. As most coaches would, I asked what my client wanted to achieve, what they were doing now, and what was the gap they needed to fill? It turned out that the students were getting disheartened when they got an answer incorrect, also the client didn't believe she was helping the situation. Now, I know my client is an excellent teacher, I have actually attended an online class as part of our sessions, but we quickly realized that it came down to one word, and that word was NO.
Sometimes my client would (in the interests of time) just say no to a student if they got an answer incorrect. This is actually true of some leaders at work when an idea is proposed in a meeting, or a suggestion is offered on the workshop floor. as with students, employees can get disheartened if they feel they are not part of the building process.
I, for one, know this little quote to be true:
A person (student or employee) who feels appreciated will always exceed their teacher or manager's expectation.
So today I have put together a couple of alternatives to the word NO, I know there are hundreds of others, but these especially will work for both students and employees. If you have any more, let me know by leaving a comment below. I would love to hear them and if I get enough, I will also share them as a poster or something similar.
Tip of the week: Try not to simply say NO.
Try these instead,
Let's look at this together?
Can you give me another suggestion?
Do you have another idea?
That's interesting, what made you think of that?
How can we make this work?
We may need to adjust your idea a bit
May I think about that?
How would you answer that question?
That's a good idea, however, can you think of any problems that may arise?
I like your thinking, let's set up a time to discuss this further?
By the way, my client started utilizing more open-ended questions and then used more statements like; good try, a nice thought, have another go and my favorite, lots of people think the answer is that, just like you do. It made a massive impact on them. As a teacher I always believed that the goal is to build trust with students so they knew, I wasn't trying to embarrass them.
Let me know your thoughts, but most importantly, have a great week out there.
I hope you enjoyed a restful weekend
This week I would like to share with you a tool I was given to support my clients between coaching sessions. This tool is all about using humor to build resilience.
This week I have included the tool and attached the full document for you to share with your friends and colleagues to help them too.
But first as always, my weekly quote.
"A good laugh overcomes more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than any other one thing." –Laura Ingalls Wilder.
Did you know that Humor is a powerful way to bring more laughter, lightness, and joy into your life? Researchers have found that humor is an important way to create connections with others. You are 30 times more likely to laugh with other people than when you are alone.
Laughter has positive effects on your body by acting as a signal that you are relaxed and safe. When you laugh, your brain “decides” that everything is good and there is no need to be in survival mode.
This worksheet will help you reflect on funny things that happen throughout your day to add playfulness and laughter to your daily routine. Doing this activity daily for just one week has been shown to increase resilience and reduce depression.
So, my EDGE tip of the week is “Add a little more laughter to your day”
What to do
For this or every week, take 10 minutes each day to complete the following activity. You will need a notebook or journal and pen, or you may use the “notes” function on your smartphone.
1. At the end of each day, write down or type three funny things you experienced, witnessed, or heard, and describe how they made you feel. If you have a hard time remembering anything funny, search for “funny videos” on the Internet or watch a light comedy.
2. Next, write down why you found each thing funny. Also, note who you were with, were you with friends, co-workers, or family? Were you alone? Be as detailed as possible.
3. Use the attached chart to track your progress. Include the date, check off if you completed the activity, and note how you felt before and after writing about three funny things.
I have no doubt you will find this of value in your daily life, all I ask is that share it and let me know how it goes for you.
This week I would like to offer you some thoughts that may give you an EDGE. Just like success, getting an EDGE will mean different things to different people. For some it may be finding the one thing that makes their day more productive, for others, it may be a supporting tool to help them move out of their comfort zone in their life, be it at work or at home, in business, or in love. For others, it really could be as simple as something to help them enjoy each day, a little more.
As you know, this is the name of my Coaching business (EDGE) and it is the model I use to help when partnering with clients. You may have noticed I use the following poem at the foot of all my e-mails as I believe it will resonate with many people wanting a little more, but may feel wary of stepping outside their comfort zone. It goes like this
“Come to the EDGE, “we can’t, we are afraid, “come to the EDGE”, “we can’t, we might fall”
“come to the EDGE”, and they came... and he pushed them, and they flew. Guillaume Apollinaire
I think there are many people in this world, who would just love to take a step forward and see what they can really achieve. Some are being held back by inner doubts, fearing their real power and what may happen if it is unleashed and then, of course, there are those who are telling themselves they are content in their comfort zone, but looking out wondering what life is like on the other side. To these people I always say, you will never know unless you dip your foot over the EDGE.
So how do you go about doing this, stepping over the EDGE? Well, it starts with my 4-step plan which you can easily follow, and even if you only achieve step one, I guarantee you that you will be nearer to your intention than you are right now.
My Tip of the Week this week is "Create an EDGE for yourself"
Steps and what they may look like.
ENGAGE; you don't have t go it alone
Now, go and create your EDGE
I hope you all had a great bank holiday weekend.
I had the pleasure of playing golf actually, even though I am in beautiful Barbados, it was raining. In fact, we had to stop after nine as we were soaked. We retired to the bar and met up with some friends who were having a deep conversation about the world and how these days people are so easily manipulated by society. he spoke about how soccer players live their life based on their endorsements, that the opportunity to make a lot of money will change a person's way of living. He postulated that he could likely change the way people live their lives by inserting someone to overtime change their way of living.
It was an interesting conversation that had me thinking, I mean he had a point, and actually coaching is about supporting people to change the way they think. I suppose the fundamental difference was about people who want to change their thinking versus people who are being manipulated into believing things to appease others or for financial gain.
So this week I thought I would post a Tip of the week around living your values. I love this quote from a former Republican and attorney about living your values, he said:-
Your core values act like your internal compass that navigates the course of your life. If you compromise your values, you go nowhere. Roy T Bennett
The second line is a little harsh but the first one is entirely correct. I believe that the powerful thing about having strong values is that people get to know and understand you very quickly, knowing exactly where you will draw the line. If you are consistent in living your values, they will be a part of everything you do, at home or at work. You will never be manipulated or taken for granted in any way, in fact, you will more likely be respected for standing your ground because that's just the way you are built.
So this week, remind yourself of your core values, what you go out of your way to do or maybe not do. What generally makes you irritated or upset? (this will highlight a value not being met). Who are you?
Tip of the week. Live your best life, live your core values.
Think about it during this short week and see if you can live your values a little more. It has the ability to
How are you and how are you feeling right now? We know there's a lot going on these days and things can get a little hectic. Through this please it is important to remember, there's no time like the present to have a look at life and how things are progressing.
This week I have for you, a little tool used to help my clients refresh their thinking. But first, I would like to share this little quote with you;-
“You can’t change who you are, but you can change what you have in your head; you can refresh what you're thinking about, you can put some fresh air in your brain.” --Ernesto Bertarelli
I share this as one of the things I love about my work is the opportunity to support clients to stop and question the thoughts and beliefs that limit their perspective so they can see a new way forward to achieve their desires, intentions goals, call them what you will.
So this week's "Tip of the week" is partly a thought, but mostly action. This week:-
"Make time to refresh and renew your thoughts"
You can do this in any number of ways. You can write up a few goals, some action steps, or even things you would like to stop doing. Be proactive as the main thing here is to spring clean ready for the new refreshed you.
so here is a tool to help you with this, you can complete it, then cut it out to put somewhere as a reminder.
All I ask is that you consider this as a way of refreshing and renewing your aims and objectives for the coming month. Oh, and if you find value in it, why not share it with friends or family, anyone you feel may benefit from a spring clean. Let me know how you get on and have fun doing it.
Richie Forde, Performance Coach and the Founder of Edge Coaching Services.