It is "tip of the week time" again. Sorry, it is a day late, but we had a restful bank holiday today.
Anyway, have you heard this lovely quote?
“A gentle word, a kind look, a good-natured smile can work wonders and accomplish miracles.”– William Hazlitt
It is so true; you can accomplish so much with a smile.
As a form tutor who wanted to improve the students' enjoyment of school, I would challenge my students to smile at as many teachers as possible during the day and see how many smiled back at them. They loved our little secret challenge; we used to talk in tutor time about the different teachers and the impact smiling had on them. Obviously, some teachers thought a couple of the students were acting strange, but it was a worthwhile exercise for the most part. Some even discussed the impact the newly found mindset had on their lessons, which was great.
This brings me to my tip for this week.
“Smile; it makes you and those around you feel better.”
It also makes you more approachable, boosts your mood, relieves stress, and makes you seem more attractive, sociable, and confident.
Just try it for a day, smile whenever someone passes by, comes to see you, or you go to see them. You will very likely receive a positive response. If not, at least you will feel great.
Enjoy the rest of your week and, of course, follow your dreams.
You have to believe
I hope you are having a fabulous week.
In these trying times (for all manner of reasons), we truly must keep going and believe we will come out of them stronger and more learned than before. As a coaching tip, I thought I would share a quote from one of my peers Darren Poke, who writes a fantastic blog.
As coaches, our role is to believe in you and your creativity and resourcefulness to achieve. So essentially, focusing on improving your performance by growing your potential and by decreasing interference. Self-belief is paramount to removing interferences.
Enjoy, and I’ll speak to you soon.
Remember to follow your dreams.
You have to believe
You have to believe that your goals can be achieved.
You have to believe in your capacity to make your world and the world a better place.
You have to believe in the people around you.
You have to believe that you can make it through these challenging times.
You have to believe that you deserve blessings.
You have to believe in the voices cheering you on, more than the critics telling you to stop.
You have to believe that you haven’t peaked yet.
You have to believe in the power of persistence.
You have to believe that love is more powerful than hate.
You have to believe that when you work with passion and purpose, remarkable things are possible.
Because the moment you stop believing, is the moment you stop progressing.
Self Coaching Part 1
This week I had a session with another coach; I use these sessions to sharpen my skills as a coach. One incite I garnered from this conversation was the following phrase.
“If you want to change, you have to feel the pain.
So, following on from the "Tip of the Week" on Monday (The three reasons people don't achieve their goals), I thought I would do a 4-part email to help you with any changes you want to make. This is a great opportunity to be ready for implementing change ready for the new year. We will work on this together using the GROW model. This is the most widely used model in coaching, and the questions are taken from my coaching questions template, used with some of my clients.
This first email will outline the questions regarding what you want to change, the G of GROW, which stands for your goal. (or, in this case, the changes you wish to make.
Before we start, I would like to remind you of the following:
We would all like to make changes but can never find the time or energy to do it. Then there is also the tremendous pace of change, and currently, the circumstance in the world around us, which we know is unlikely to slow down anytime soon. Coping with change at work, at home, or in life, in general, can be a huge challenge. This self-coaching journey can help you get started with change. So let’s go.
A Self-reflection Exercise
First, identify something you would like to achieve at work, at home, or in life in general.
Please write down your answers to the following questions, interpreting them in a way that seems appropriate to you. Stick it on the fridge or in your note pad ready for part 2
1. What would you like to work on?
2. What would you like to have after answering this set of questions (e.g., a first step/strategy/solution)?
3. What is your goal related to this issue?
4. When are you going to achieve it?
5. What are the benefits for you in achieving this goal?
If you need any of these questions explained further, feel drop me an email
The exercise questions help raise your awareness, which encourages you to take responsibility for achieving your goal. The fact that you come up with your own solutions will also raise your confidence to achieve your goal.
Take your time; you have a week, return to them periodically, and make changes as necessary. If you have any questions, feel free to reach out. You do not have to share the answers with me, but I am happy to take a look if you wish.
Best of luck with your change journey, and if there is anyone whom you know who could benefit from this exercise, let me know or forward it to them. I would be happy to add them to my mailing list. Sharing is caring.
Here I am with this week’s tip of the week or, more to the point, tip for the week.
We have all heard the quote:
“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ― Maya Angelou
But my question is, “how do you practice emotional intelligence (EQ), making people feel great on a day to day basis?
Here is my tip of the week for you to have a go at:
Find opportunities to give someone a lollypop moment each day this week.
By this, I mean, go up to someone unsuspecting and tell them they have mattered, do matter, or will matter to you or the business.
We have all had someone in our lives that made a positive impact, haven’t we?
If you want to understand this further, try this exercise I did during coach training that helped me understand EQ.
Recall someone you loved being with when you were younger, a grandparent, a boss, a teacher, any role model. When you were with this person, what did they do that you liked so much? How did you feel around them? Think about the person's attitudes and behaviors.
I can almost guarantee this person listened to you, believed in you, challenged you, trusted, and respected you. Gave you time and full attention and treated you as an equal. More importantly, you very likely felt special, valued, confident, safe, and cared for, supported, and around them, you believed in yourself. They probably also made things fun to do.
Now I understand that not everyone’s daily activities can be fun; however, we can all make someone feel better about things happening at the moment.
Give someone a lollypop moment, go see them, send a text, email, or a “stick it” note, and tell them how much you appreciate them, for their efforts, something they have achieved, or the fact that you are just happy they are part of your team. Now that is a lollypop moment for them, and they will never forget how you made them feel.
To learn more about Lollypop moments for leaders, check out the great 4 minute TED talk on the home page. (Available for one week from 22/11) there after find it here. Recognizing the Power of Lollypop Moments | Drew Dudley - YouTube
Have a great week.
I hope you are having a great week.
Firstly, you may recall my email dated 8th September, where I spoke about the coaching equation Performance = Potential – Interferences? I received so much positive feedback, I thought I would return to it.
What is a "goal"? A quick internet search reveals the following definition: The object of a person's ambition or effort; an aim or desired result.
So why do so many people fail to achieve theirs?
I read somewhere that “The single greatest reason people fail to achieve a goal is that they set the goal for something they didn’t truly love.”
Think of some of the things you have achieved. It may have been financially (saving for a holiday), educationally (achieving your qualifications), or professionally getting your first job; because you really wanted to achieve that goal, you made it happen regardless of any interferences.
Three things really seem to get in our way of reaching our ambition. However, if you can identify these and accept that they are simply part of the process, then you can treat them for what they are--just things to handle--rather than letting them stop you.
1. Concerns: Things that come to mind as soon as you decide on a goal. Things like,
· The job market is so difficult at the moment
· I do not have enough time to go for it
2. Fears: As soon as you decide on a goal, you suddenly experience feelings of fear, and you will come up with loads of false evidence that will seem real to you.
· What if I am not good enough?
· What if it’s too much work?
3. Roadblocks: These things may be out of your control, which could hinder your progress once you get over concerns and fears. Things like,
· There is a restructure, and the role is changed
· Other people stand between you and your goal
We all know there are many more; however, your “goal” will be so much nearer once you can address these interferences.
If you think you may need help in any aspect of achieving your goals, reach out. Coaching is about maximizing potential and getting the client from where they are to where you want to be. Visit my website at www.edgebarbados.com or drop me an email to start a conversation.
Enjoy the rest of your week and follow your dreams.
TOTW: Just ask!!
It is nearly Christmas!! Remember when we were younger, and we used to ask Father Christmas for what we wanted? Why is it as adults we have stopped asking?
Here is a quote I love to cite when I talk to my clients; I always express a version of this to aid their commitment level.
“If you're not actively involved in getting what you want, you don't really want it.”
Whether you are in education, a parent, an employee, or the owner of a business, the above will always be true.
This week’s tip is about you making progress swiftly and efficiently as possible. You know that life, career, or executive coaching is about maximizing your potential, and this is most definitely a good start to doing that.
The tip of the week I would like to see you try for this week.:
Ask for what you want (and how to get there)
I’m sure there are people out there who’ve been successful in many things without asking for it, but a much more certain approach is to tell your manager, parent, headteacher, or CEO exactly what you want and if you can’t have it now, how to get there.
Look at it from a different angle.
Try: “I’m not sure I’ve shared this before, but I’d really like to make manager level, and I feel I’m more or less ready for the challenge. What can I do to get there?”
Or, as a student, try: “Sir, I’m not sure I’ve shared this before, but I’d really like to move up a set in this subject, and I feel I’m more or less ready for the challenge. What can I do to get there?”
However, you choose to let people know your ambition; it is sure to let people know what you really want. Then go for it, and once you know how to get there (if you need further support in making it), get some coaching to help you get there quicker and more efficiently than if you were doing it alone.
Visit www.edgebarabados.com to see what coaching can do to support you. But in the meantime, let people know what it is you want.
I would love to hear what you asked for this week.
Be brave, have a successful week, and follow your dreams.
Be prepared!! Performance review
Have you ever got to performance review time or had an important interview scheduled and had to start to write your key achievements? Have you struggled to remember what you have achieved?
This is a familiar story for many of us, but one that can easily be changed!
Whether you are preparing for your performance review or an interview - get in the habit of recording your evidence throughout the year.
Create a project folder either for each target or one that will encapsulate all of your targets. Keep the folder in a visible place so that you are reminded to add to it on a regular basis.
Each time you achieve a significant milestone for one of your targets, add it to your evidence folder.
Put time aside in your weekly calendar to review your evidence folder and add any new accomplishments.
Putting a structure together to achieve your targets is a must if you want to keep track of your progress. Preparing for performance review makes the process far easier. Taking a portfolio of evidence that you can show your line manager, demonstrates a commitment to your role.
As a coach, my role is to support you in maximizing your potential, supporting you in using your resourceful and creative mind to grow.
If you would like to know more about the support you can get from coaching for performance, visit my website at www.edgebarbados.com or send me an email.
I hope you had a restful weekend.
I thought I would share a great business tip to help promote your colleagues as problem solvers. There is a great quote from one of my favorite author and Success Coach, Saji Ijiyemi.
“You are either supporting the vision or supporting division”
We are all familiar with water cooler discussions. Informal discussions with colleagues can play a vital part in helping your business succeed but negative discussions can act as a barrier to success.
This week’s tip is one for you to share with your peers, send out as an email, share with someone the next time you hear a negative comment, print the attached sheet, stick it up in the staff room. It says the following:
Be a Problem Solver, Not a Complainer
If you see an issue, embrace the challenge, and think about what the solution might be before you discuss it with your colleagues. That way you will build your reputation as a problem solver rather than a problem-bringer and your colleagues will respect you as a creative thinker and leader.
Try to incorporate this into your week and let me know the responses you get.
I wish you a great week
Student SWOT analysis
I hope this email from EDGE Coaching Services finds you well.
"Congratulations, well done, you did it!!! You know I always thought you were going to achieve that. That grade is awesome. You worked so hard, you have, "I am ready for the next level" written all over you. You must be so proud of what you achieved here".
Hey, were you getting that sense of success, achievement, triumph? Were you so excited for someone you couldn’t wait to find out who it was?
Well, it could be any one of your students, they did it, they managed to use their strengths and overcome their challenges, to get them to what they were always after achieving. Well done.
Now let’s look at how they did it.
The first thing they told themselves was the following;
“Strength doesn’t come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t.”
Yes, it can be that easy, a SWOT analysis isn’t only for business.
I believe in empowering students, and as an Executive Coach, my role is to help them fill that gap they are working on and this is one of my top 10 tools to do just that. You know they can do it.
Email me to get started on creating a program proposal to use with a chosen cohort whom you think will benefit from such a program. Let's look at their challenges from a different perspective.
I acknowledge the commitment to your goals. Always follow your dreams
TOTW: Practice mindfulness
I hope this email finds you well and you are ready for the new month.
Here is your tip of the week
“Respond; don’t react. Listen; don’t talk. Think; don’t assume.”
To help you with this, practice mindfulness. “Mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally.” It helps you accomplish more things at work and enjoy more of your personal life.
Here is a good mindfulness exercise for you to practice this week.
Listen when people speak
How much of what others say do you think really gets through? How often do you find yourself consumed with thoughts or seeking distraction while someone else is speaking? Listening is a great anchor to mindfulness. Whenever you're in conversation, aim to pay closer attention, make eye contact, and ask questions to fully take in what the speaker is saying. You’ll gain more insights and form a deeper bond.
In coaching this practice is a cornerstone to our client’s successes, and I believe it can make your week more productive.
Give it a go and let me know if it has an impact on your week. Remember; “Life is a dance. Mindfulness is witnessing that dance.” Amit Ray
Have a great week
Richie Forde, Performance Coach and the Founder of Edge Coaching Services.